Rethink! 6 Thoughts to Rethink about Fifty Shades of Grey.

50 sog logoThe thoughts I have of Fifty Shades of Grey flow from one main warning in God’s word.

“Woe to those who call evil good and good evil, who put darkness for light and light for darkness, who put bitter for sweet and sweet for bitter.” Isaiah 5:20

In my opinion, this summarizes the book and the phenomenon that has followed it. As a stand alone book it reached success that demanded to be exploited even further. So in the cookie cutter format, a trilogy is produced along products to sell and of course a movie to cap it all off.

From a worldview perspective it continues the disturbing trend of a moral revolution going on in our culture. It is a trend of popularizing and thus normalizing immorality. To see so many people to jump on this bandwagon of sin in order to have an escape into a fantasy world, saddens and sickness my heart both at the same time. But that is what porn is. Even mommy porn and yes- there I said it because the term is appropriate. ‘Fifty shades’ is not just the simple romance get away. It is the intentional evil area of sin that it dives into and that even as the author admits, sees life through gray morality.

But I think it does even more than that. It actually swaps white for black, right for wrong.

Here are my quick thoughts to help us view this in a proper Christian perspective.

“Woe to all who call evil good…”

1. The popularity of this book doesn’t justify the evil in it.
I find it amazing that for a culture that has been screaming at the church that submission is old fashioned, irrelevant and downright wrong, has been o.k. to embrace and been excited for this type of dominance and abuse. The violence and abuse shelters have raised their own boycott of the movie. Even the BDSM community is saying Fifty Shades portrays BDSM wrong!

The popularity and draw of this book, says more about the sinful heart of man than it does about the issues of morality. Sinful hearts love to walk in darkness.

But Christian beware: “if we say we have fellowship with him [Jesus Christ] while we walk in darkness, we lie and do not practice the truth (1 John 1:6). Quit lying to yourself. Repent and pray for a greater work of the Spirit to unite your heart in order to fear the Lord reverently.

2. BDSM is a perversion not an expression.
For those not in the know, BDSM stands for Bondage Discipline Dominance Submission Sadism Masochism. It purposefully uses a controlling factor of one partner dominating over another submissive partner in order to experience mutual sexual satisfaction. While the BDSM community is using this moment to educate people of the basic tenets of its activities as safe sane and consensual, I would challenge that within the marriage bed of people it perverts the very picture of true oneness that a loving couple is to enjoy under the watchful eye of the Lord.

The Lord created sex to be enjoyed and ultimately to be expressed in a manner that gives Him glory. BDSM is a perverted, degrading expression. That doesn’t give honor to the Lord nor does it honor either of the participants. Matt Fradd says “Consenting to being degrading doesn’t make being degraded any more cool, any more acceptable,” See what other lies ‘Fifty Shades’ have about sexuality in this video link here.

“Woe to those… who put dark for light”

3. Christian Grey molestation should disturb a woman’s soul.
I’m referring to both instances: the molestation of 15 year old Christian Grey from a family friend which formed the pattern of a BDSM lifestyle and as an adult Grey’s molesting of Ana Steele. Both of these accounts should disturb the reader, not attract them. If he was a real person he would have a restraining order and would creep out the average woman. Can anyone say “stalker?”

4. Sexual tension should never result in sexual abuse.
The persistent pursuit of Ana from Christian, creates a sexual tension between the two that ultimately results in him raping her at the end of the first book. This supposed get away fantasy erotic novel ignores again what a generation of young people who are now grown up have heard their entire life… that no means no.

“Woe to those …who put bitter for sweet”

5. Ana Steele is the poster child for stupid love.
Thanks to Dr. Laura Schlessinger (love her or hate her) I have category I call stupid love and it basically is a combination of her two books 10 stupid things women do to men up here lives and 10 stupid things men do to mess up their lives. While these books and her advice are not biblical and I take issue with some of what she says, there are some basic head hitting things that I have found in counseling that speak directly to someone like the character Ana Steel

• Stupid chivalry- getting involved with the wrong person thinking your love with transform or change them.
• Stupid attachment- a woman defining yourself in the context of a man.
• Stupid devotion- finding yourself willing to love, suffer and try to rescue in vain.
• Stupid forgiveness- not knowing when to pull the plug on a no-win relationship.

Put all of this together and I call it stupid love. The journey Ana takes through the trilogy of books that ends up with her love changing Christian only works in fantasy books. Unfortunately it sends the wrong message to real life couple that love is all you need.

Real life couples who are trying to get healthy need Christ, commitment and counseling. Real life people and love cannot change a broken and disturbed heart. Christ does that. Real life people fall out of love all the time. A covenant commitment will aid in viewing a relationship properly and for the long haul. Real life people are blinded and have a limited view of themselves and circumstances. Good biblical counseling that is prayerfully and graciously working through issues is what helps marriages to thrive.

6. Don’t confuse rape with romance/love.
“Wasn’t that great?”
Uh no.

In fact Ana cries about the wrong thing. She cries about her love for a man who she senses is incompatible. She should’ve been crying over being raped and later allowing her “emotional love” for him to pursue the relationship further.

The Lord’s commands and sexual boundaries are made to provide and protect us. It provides for us the sweet intimacy that God intended us to have with each other, male and female. It can even provide a full fun satisfying sex life that glorifies God. (See the article at this link) It protects us from the bitter heart that stems the emotional scars and at times, physical pain of sex outside of the marital relationship.



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